The force of gravity exerted by a freshly mopped floor.

There is something about mopping a floor. Running a mop over a floor seems to enact a subtle change in the force of gravity. It can't be measured and it can't be felt my mere humans. In fact, witnesses claim that it even seems to fluctuate.
But, there is no denying that the force of gravity exerted by a freshly mopped floor is not the same as it was before it was mopped. You could go without mopping for days and days, leaving spots and splatters, or wiping them up with a sponge and would be unable to observe this phenomenon.

But, as soon as you pull out the mop and clean from one side of the floor to the other, scrubbing all the dirt off, the gravity field changes. Children sitting at the table with food and drinks will suddenly find themselves dropping utensils full of food. Messy bites of food will leap off of forks before they make it to mouths and splatter on the floor. Cups full of sticky lemonade or chocolate milk will be pulled from little hands to land with a splash to spreads sticky liquids all under the table. Even sippy cups with a lid are not immune. Just this morning I watched as the lid was pulled from a sippy cup upturned in mid-drink, and orange juice spilled down the front of my child, down the stool, on the table, but mostly all over the floor. All because I had mopped the floor after supper last night.


Mopping the floor pulls the ice cream right out of an ice cream sandwich and straight to the floor. Sometimes it takes some of the cookie part, too. I have seen with my own eyes that the pull of gravity from a clean floor will cause popsicles to break in half, leaving a sticky puddle of melted goo to be cleaned up.

Strangely, this phenomenon can be stopped, or at least greatly reduced by allowing the floor to become sufficiently dirty. If I make a mess cooking supper and leave a few splatters on the floor to be cleaned up after supper, like magic, no one will spill their drink at dinner. No child will drop his or her fork full of spaghetti. No sippy cups will lose their tops. Ice cream will not drip from its sandwich and popsicles will not break before being consumed.

It doesn't take much. Just a few little splatters, maybe even a dropped bit of tomato or onion. A drift of lettuce that escaped from a salad. That's enough to break the spell on the floor and the force of gravity will return to normal. Even sweeping or wiping up the mess with a cloth doesn't restore the spell. All will be well.

That is, until the mop is pulled out once more, and pushed across the floor, cleaning the dirt from all the corners and leaving the floor shiny clean in its wake. Only then will the force of gravity once more begin to fluctuate and once again forks and cups will fall, popsicles will snap in two until enough dirt has accumulated on the floor to break the spell yet again.

This I truly believe.