Like holy shit damn and fuck. Sam scared the ever loving bejeebus out of me this morning. I was making mac and cheese for his preschool T'day lunch today and he was playing on the deck. What with global warming and all it was plenty warm and I just had the back door open. At some point he went down to play in the yard, which he does all the time. The yard is fenced and I can see it from the kitchen, if I'm not staring at a pot of mac and cheese.
I got it all made and in the dish and went to get him so we could go get dressed and he wasn't in sight. Looked under the deck. Called him many, many times. Checked inside the play thing. Thought maybe he was in the house and I didn't notice him walk by. I tore through the house yeliing "Sam, Sam where are you!??!" No answer. I went out the front door, thinking maybe he climbed over the fence and was playing in the front yard, calling him all the time and starting to fucking panic. I went around the side of the house, and was going to call 911 if I didn't find him over there, when I found him.
He was squeezing (not even squeezing really) through the gap between our fence and the neighbor's fence and back into our yard. He had clearly been out of our yard, but I don't know if he was just outside the fence and I couldn't see him over it, or if he was out exploring and came back because he heard me calling him.
Then the little shit ran away from me in our yard, laughing at me. I snatched him up and brought him inside and called the manwhore and sat down and cried.
The gap in the fence will be fixed when we get back next week. I didn't even know they knew it was there, and really we shouldn't have waited to see. But, we forgot it was there. Bad parents. It hasn't always been there, but the neighbors tore down their old fence and had a new one put up. For some reason the new one doesn't sit quite as far back, thus resulting in the gap.
I need a fucking drink, I think.
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